38 Weeks

So my doctor checked me at today's appointment and I'm dilated 2 centimeters and hardly effaced. Waaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!! I've been hoping a little too much that I'll deliver early this time, only now I'm trying to face the fact that I may not. :( The baby was really high as well, so she couldn't tell how big he is. But I'm thinkin this could be a good thing and maybe he's not as huge as we thought. Because I haven't been measuring as big lately and she thought it was due to him moving down. But if he hasn't moved down very far then maybe he's not as big as I feared. Right? I still think he'll be over 8 lb.'s, but maybe not the 10 I've been terrified of. I haven't gained any weight the last few weeks either, so maybe, just maybe he's not a moose! :)
Right now I'm just trying to trust that the Lord has a perfect timing for him to come. I've really been wanting to go a little early and not be late again, it's so hard to move and do anything!! But, at the same time, Cisco's assistant is moving to Seattle tomorrow which leaves him with no paid help for the last week of school and the Pastor's Conference. His parents come May 21st and will be here until June 6th, so just as long as he's born before June, I'm thinking that's all I care about! My doctor leaves this week for vacation as well, so I'll be seeing different doctors for the remainder of my appointments. I haven't seen any of them yet, and I'm praying they don't make me wait for weeks to have this baby. A couple days late I think I can handle, but weeks?! I'll cry. I would love for his parents to be able to spend some time with him before they have to leave. And I will really need the help! So please....PRAY! For me to be patient and trust the Lord, and that he'll be born in a somewhat convenient time...does that happen? :)